Tentative, ah, Rumblings

Just update every day. On a topic. I guess. I want to write an essay every week, that’s productive and in a way safe. I mean that I can refine my craft, but a little bit removed so that you don’t have to see the results immediately and think things like “huh” “what” or “this is really terrible, André”. Of course this assumes a “you”, there really isn’t a “you” for the blog and maybe I should work on that as well but how does a person do that in a way that’s not conniving, petty, or mean? Promotion just seems ugly to me at this point, I guess. This isn’t really worth promoting, you know? It’s just a thing. I shouldn’t even think in those terms, ever really.


This past election Chester Brown ran for the Libertarian party and defended his government grants with “Well, if I don’t take them someone else well, and it’s better that they go to me.” And in that sentiment were two ideas, wrapped up:

  • That he deserves the grant, because he is good and works hard.
  • That he deserves the grant because it could potentially go to someone who doesn’t work hard, or is not good.

Should I think in similar terms? Or start to? To me it just seems so mercenary.

But it does remind me of something one of my uncles (and I have many) said about my mom’s artwork and how he always thought she should be doing a better job of promotion. And maybe she still should, but I think she has improved in that regard. Related is the fact that her work has settled in a style that is “good” and that I think is “accurate”, does that mean I just don’t feel “settled” in that aspect? But her situation at 22 was much different than my situation now. But why would I even bring it up if I felt “complete” or “whole” artistically?

This post and the post below come from an interview with James Kochalka where he says that American Elf is a great way to structure his day, and to always remain thinking creatively. How he feels bad if he hasn’t made anything, because creating is a huge part of his self-worth. That’s also true for me. I do write usually. I need to get back to writing every day. Even if I don’t necessarily feel like working on what I am working on, I need to write a minimum amount of words. I need to stop worrying about things like what certain people will say. Maybe I need to update this every day too, so I can see what I’ve done and am doing. With at least one entry of substance, or that I am proud of, or that I like, per day.

I’m suddenly reminded of an essay Haruki Murakami wrote about writing for the New Yorker. I could find it for you but you could find it for yourself just as easily. Search “Haruki Murakami” “running” and “New Yorker”.

One thing that I am working on is making writing simpler so that it flows easier from point to point. I have a tendency to hold certain crucial details in my head, which works well for prose poetry but not very well when you are working on a long novel and what is in your head at specific points during the writing changes from day-to-day. I really think that for something short (a comic, a poem, a short story) you can keep the art inside and do a good job, but for longer things you have to focus on telling your story simply and making sure that it is a story, and that it is coherent, and the rest will fall into place. It’s interesting because I think four or five years ago I was good for plot, but I really had to work on style and technique, and now that I’m at plot again it is coming back to me, but slowly, because I spent a long time in the ghetto.


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