
No one ever runs out of hot water
The concierge greets you smiling
Your immunity to the million-dollar view is mysterious; girls like that
The pool is always there, clean & open
No one has ever used the pool, except those shawled Muslim women you once watched through the window
It feels nice to catch the door and hold it for the other residents
The same goes for the elevator
No one ever runs out of hot water
There’s alarm systems on all of the doors, even if no one can figure out how they work
En-suite washer & dryer
When the decor gets stale they paint the hallways for you
The carpets hanging in the service elevator make it look like the womb—comforting
Curtains are unnecessary because you are above all of the other buildings
If anyone tried to break into your apartment a neighbour would probably hear it
No one has ever been found rummaging through the recycling
The time you rummaged through the recycling no one caught you
No matter what time it is the light underneath the doorcrack never extinguishes, reminding you that you are never alone
The fire-alarms foster community
No one ever runs out of hot water
You’ve cultivated a kind of half-nodding, half-wincing relationship with the guy downstairs who is always washing the windows
The gym gets cable
Most of the community rooms are usually free for use
Your apartment sleeps eight pretty comfortably, as long as someone doesn’t mind sleeping on the bath mat
There are plenty of restaurants that deliver
The central air recirculates efficiently
No one ever runs out of hot water
That nice couple in the suite next to yours will give you gifts a couple of times, which you think about reciprocating until you realize that you never see them anyway
No one ever runs out of hot water
You don’t ever have to leave, unless you really want to